Author: Emily Flake

When skiing just won’t cut it anymore

If that spooky painting my parents love so much shows up anywhere I’m burning down the whole Internet

Just you wait ‘til I’m in charge

It’s important or else you won’t know who won

Real estate’s a son-of-a-bitch

Put on a goddamn sweater and quit touchin’ the thermostat

Don’t nobody call Social Services, ok?

Can the elves develop apps?

They’re not just an excuse to buy a sun lamp

Making a comic about it was no help at all